"Puff"-ed up

"I have so many balls I'm juggling. I'm one of the most respected designers, producers ... aspiring actor. I'm making TV shows. I got six kids. Then I like to party."

Ladies and gentlemen, the good and humble P. Diddy.

So, I was watching the premiere of the new VH1 reality show "I Want to Work For Diddy" last night. The show brings together a dozen deluded folks from all walks of life - an Iraq war vet, a tranny, a recovering journalist, a bunch of narcissists - who are yearning to fetch Sean Combs' fruit salad and embarrass themselves for the privilege of being embarrassed by the Bad Boy himself. (I'm already mildly disappointed because the best-looking girl on the show was booted after the first episode).

Things unfold about as expected - minus the sex. You can read more about it here.

And it will apparently be some time before the contestants meet Combs (I refuse to call him Diddy), who calls himself one of the world's "most demanding CEOs." I have to disagree. He should have said "demeaning."

Not to mention, Combs and Co. must be fooling themselves. They always talk about working for Combs as if it's the entertainment equivalent to being appointed to a federal court. Not quite.

I'll leave you all with another Diddyism: "If you can't see the forest through the trees, you need to chop them muthafuckas down."

Sigh. Combs is a genius, I tell ya. Or better yet, he'll tell ya too.